Chronic Pain And Intimacy (And How To Spice Up Your Life)

Note: This post contains Affiliate Links which pay me a small percentage of your purchase price at no cost to you.

When you live with Chronic Pain, everything you do becomes a new challenge. Working, socializing, taking care of kids and/or a home – you still need to do it all and live your life, but now you have persistant pain as your constant companion. Often, you find yourself compromising or looking for better ways of doing things, so your pain isn’t exacerbated.

One of the areas of life with Chronic Pain which is often not talked about is intimacy and your sexual well-being. These are crucial components of a good relationship, but what happens when pain causes you to withdraw from sexual relations, and intimacy begins to suffer? Let’s talk about some of the reasons this happens and what can be done.

Difficulties with intimacy may stem from various causes, including increased pain during sexual activity, a lack of arousal and accompanying vaginal dryness, the inability to reach orgasm, side effects from the use of opioids and other commonly-used medications (eg, certain antidepressants), a past history of sexual abuse, and issues with communication in general.

Because of Chronic Pain, you may find your overall relationship has begun to suffer. A partner may withdraw from you because they don’t know how to help you. This translates to the bedroom, where they may be afraid to cause you more pain or they’re dealing with their own issues regarding your health. Perhaps your partner has become resentful of the extra burden placed on them with your inability to do certain chores now.

A change in standard routines can be upsetting for everyone and this may cause extra fatigue for you both, which also causes you to withdraw from intimacy. Sleep may be what you crave the most, and when your partner wants to have sex, it’s the last thing on your mind.

So how do you overcome these issues? What do you do to make sex more enjoyable for both of you? Here is an expanded list of ideas from a previous post that might be a good starting point.

  • Talk. Make a point of talking openly and honestly about what you are feeling. If there is fear about pain, talk about it and what you can do to alleviate any extra. If you feel disconnected from your partner because it’s been a long time since you last were intimate, talk about those feelings and what you’re worrying about. Do you have scars or extra weight that is causing you concern? Be honest about how you feel. It can be very vulnerable to speak the truth, but it often brings you closer to your partner in the long run.
  • Touch. Exploring your partner’s body through touch is an exciting way to express your sexual feelings. This can include holding hands, cuddling, fondling, stroking, massaging and kissing. Touch in any form increases feelings of intimacy.
  • Self-stimulation. Masturbation is a normal and healthy way to fulfil your sexual needs. One partner may use masturbation during mutual sexual activity if the other partner is unable to be very active.
  • Oral sex. It can be an alternative or supplement to traditional intercourse.
  • Toys. Use of various sex toys can help loosen inhibitions, relax the body and make intercourse more enjoyable.
  • Different positions. Lie side by side, kneel or sit. Look in your library or bookstore for a guide that describes and illustrates different ways to have intercourse. If you’re embarrassed to get this kind of book locally, try an online book retailer.
  • Vibrators and lubricants. A vibrator can add pleasure without physical exertion. If lack of natural lubrication is a problem, over-the-counter lubricants can prevent pain from vaginal dryness.
  • Pillows and wedges. Make use of pillows and wedges to help find comfortable positions that alleviate pressure points. A good sex shop can help you find products specifically made for this purpose.
  • Change your expectations. Because reaching orgasm can be almost impossible when you are on certain medications, you may find changing your expectations for sex will help you enjoy lovemaking more. Don’t make orgasm the ultimate goal…just enjoy sex for what it is – a pleasurable experience.
  • Ask for what you need. Listen to your body and what it’s telling you during sex. If certain activities make you feel better, do more of that. Lovemaking doesn’t always have to end in intercourse. Oral sex during a lovemaking session may be all that you desire, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
  • Prepare in Advance. It’s important for people with Chronic Pain to understand that sexual activity often takes a lot of planning. There is not as much spontaneity as there used to be. You may find you need to take your pain medication, apply heat, or stretch before sexual activity. This is also a good time to try increasing your arousal by reading erotica, watching a video, or having your partner give you a massage in the area of your pain.
  • Timing. Choose a time of day when you have less pain as a time to be sexually active. For some people as the day goes on, the pain gets worse, but the opposite also may be true for others. If you have kids, you may have to sneak away for a quickie, but even that is better than no sex at all. If you can arrange for the kids to be away overnight, it gives you plenty of time to relax and set the stage for intimacy.

Sex is meant to be a natural part of a relationship. Just because you live with Chronic Pain doesn’t preclude you from being able to enjoy lovemaking with your partner. You might want to try some of these products to bring a new spark to your bed (or living room or bathroom or…)

Kiss Me Massage Oil

Chronic Pain And Intimacy (And How To Spice Up Your Life)

Lynk Anal Lubricant

Chronic Pain And Intimacy (And How To Spice Up Your Life)

Kegel Exercisor and App

Chronic Pain And Intimacy (And How To Spice Up Your Life)

Female Stimulant

Chronic Pain And Intimacy (And How To Spice Up Your Life)

Personal Wand Massager

Chronic Pain And Intimacy (And How To Spice Up Your Life)

Personal Portable Vibrator

Chronic Pain And Intimacy (And How To Spice Up Your Life)

Love Worth Making – an Intimacy Book

Chronic Pain And Intimacy (And How To Spice Up Your Life)

Remember,

There Is Always Hope

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3 Important Lifestyle Changes (That Can Improve Your Overall Health)

Today’s post is from Guest Author Amanda Lasater. She’s bringing us information on important Lifestyle changes that can help improve your overall health.

For those of us suffering from Chronic Pain, Chronic Fatigue, or an Invisible Illness, it can feel like you’ve tried pretty much everything to improve your mental and physical well-being. Whether we’re trying a new “miracle” treatment in traditional medicine or an “ancient” holistic therapy, it’s easy to simply feel defeated by our illness. And, like with all illnesses, there will likely never be a one-size-fits-all treatment for these conditions – however, there are lifestyles changes that have been shown to significantly help improve the quality of life for those suffering from many of these life-altering illnesses. The following list contains three powerful choices in your day to day life that, over time, can help reduce the physical and mental anguish that comes along with these maladies.

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Incorporate CBD Oil Into Your Supplement Regimen

Due to the relatively new popularity of CBD oil, we don’t have enough long-term studies to make any definitive statements about its efficacy as a treatment for chronic pain, fibromyalgia, and other invisible illnesses. However, the studies we do have, combined with personal testimonies, are extremely promising. CBD – short for cannabidiol – is extracted from the cannabis plant, but it does not have any of the psychoactive properties of THC (aka, it doesn’t get you “high”). Currently, it is being used for a large number of medical purposes, including:

  • Chronic pain and inflammation
  • Epilepsy, especially in children
  • Social anxiety disorder
  • Insomnia
  • Bipolar disorder
  • Multiple sclerosis
  • Parkinson’s disease
  • Schizophrenia

So far, CBD has been shown to help with three major symptoms of many invisible illnesses: pain, anxiety, and insomnia. And for many suffering from any of these conditions, relief from even just one of these symptoms would significantly improve their quality of life. We recommend that you research CBD and your specific illness to identify all the potential benefits and decide upon which brand and dosage is best for you.  

Address Your Microbiome And Gut Health

The gut “microbiome” is what we call the highly important collection of more than 100 trillion microscopic organisms, or microbiota, that live inside our gastrointestinal tract. These organisms, which include bacteria unique to your body, play a vital role in our health by contributing nutrients and energy, protecting against infection, and supporting the immune system. In addition, we’ve discovered that these trillions of bacteria in our gut communicate directly with the neurons in our brains. More and more studies have found a link between the condition of the microbiome and many illnesses including

  • Inflammatory Bowel Diseases (IBD)
  • Fibromyalgia
  • Depression
  • Anxiety
  • Chronic Pain
  • Autoimmune disorders

Often accompanying gut dysbiosis is an overgrowth of candida (a fungus or yeast), which releases toxic byproducts into your bloodstream and causes a host of unpleasant symptoms. Many doctors report that most fibromyalgia sufferers have had Candida overgrowth. The bottom line is that the gut biome is essential to our health – and addressing and improving your gut health can improve many symptoms of invisible illnesses. The best ways to improve your gut bacteria include eating probiotic foods, eating fiber and prebiotics, avoiding antibiotics (unless absolutely necessary), quitting smoking, reducing alcohol intake, avoiding excessive sugar consumption, exercise, and eating gut-friendly foods like bone broth. 

Start An Elimination Diet To Identify Food-Related Health Issues

The food you’re eating may be the cause of many of your symptoms. For example, gluten has been linked to over 55 diseases. In fact, the major symptoms of gluten intolerance are neurological – not digestive. These common symptoms include: 

  • Chronic pain
  • Chronic fatigue
  • Depression 
  • Cognitive impairment 
  • Sleep disturbances

Gluten intolerance is identified as one of the possible root causes of fibromyalgia by many practitioners of functional medicine – a branch of medicine that aims at treating the underlying cause of an issue instead of the symptoms. The best way to identify if you have any allergies or intolerances is to start an elimination diet and introduce foods one at a time.

While we have all felt defeated by our illnesses, we’ve also learned the importance of always keeping our head up and moving forward. We’re here to tell you that you’re not alone – use these three lifestyle changes to drastically improve your quality of life and “keep on swimming.”

About The Author

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Amanda Lasater is on the editorial and research team at MattressAdvisor.com, a mattress reviews site with the mission to help each person find their best sleep ever.

Cannabis for Fibromyalgia and Invisible Illness (And Ways To Use It)

There has been much talk about the use of Cannabis for treating Fibromyalgia and other Invisible Illnesses. I recently featured John Martinez from Axon who wrote about using CBD Oil for treating migraine headaches. Today I want to share various ways you can use CBD Oils to obtain optimum health. 

While there are many cannabinoids in the plant, THC and CBD are the ones “in charge” for fighting pain and inflammation. What about Hemp? Hemp has some very mild “anti-pain” properties, its use is best suited in other applications. This article by Cannadish gives an excellent breakdown of all three components. 

So how do you use Cannabis to help with a medical condition like Fibromyalgia or MS or arthritis? 

As an example, a Cannabis-infused Topical lotion can be applied to the skin on the areas affected by your health condition, but having a bath is a great solution to have your whole body relax with cannabis oil. It’s especially great before going to bed. One easy way to do this is by making cannabis-infused bath bombs.

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The Process

 

INGREDIENTS

100mg CBD from the dealer of your choice*

1 tablespoon olive oil or coconut oil.

1 cup baking soda

1/2 cup Citric Acid (can be purchased at any soap making store)

1/2 cup Epsom Salt

1/2 cup corn starch

1 teaspoon water Food colouring of your choice

Your choice of essentials oils 30-40 drops

INSTRUCTIONS

  1. Place the dry ingredients in a large bowl and mix together with a whisk.
  2. In a small bowl, mix the liquid ingredients together, including the CBD oil until well blended.
  3. In the large bowl, very slowly add the liquid mixture to the dry ingredients a little bit at a time. The mixture should hold together when squeezed without crumbling.
  4. When well mixed, pack the mixture into your bath bomb mould and pack tightly, then let it dry. Make sure you work quickly so the mixture doesn’t dry out in the process.
  5. Bath Bombs need a full day to fully harden. If they’re not quite hardened enough, they may crumble when you handle them, so check to make sure before taking them completely out of the mould
  6. Makes one good size bath bomb, or several smaller if you are using smaller moulds

*Note: Depending on the strength of the CBD oil you have, the volume (drops or ml) of oil needed for this recipe will vary. For instance, an oil containing 1mg CBD per drop will require 100 drops. Having trouble calculating? Try this CBD oil calculator

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To use your new bath bomb, simply add to a tub of warm, almost hot water and relax for 20 minutes (min). 

Other Forms Of Use

The Patch

Cannabis can be used in other forms as well. Some companies have been selling a Patch. Like the patch used for the diabetic nerve pain treatment, it provides the patient with a controlled release of the medication:

  • Through a porous membrane covering a reservoir of medication.
  • Body heat melting thin layers of medication embedded in the adhesive which will contain high potency cannabinoid (CBD) extract. This extract slowly enters the bloodstream and then penetrates the central nervous system of the patient thus delivering the pain relief sought.

Edibles

This excellent article talks about Cannabis Edibles and the many ways you can enjoy the benefits of this particular form of consumption.  Instructions are given as to dosage, benefits, side effects and more, and it also contains a bit of history as to how edibles came to be so popular. 

The author and I share very similar views that all these forms of ingesting Cannabis are beneficial to those who suffer from Fibromyalgia, MS, Lupus, Arthritis, and more. 

I recommend finding a store near you where you can begin a relationship with the staff to get all your questions answered. Many US States are now allowed to sell legally and Cannabis is legal in Canada as well. 

Get to know the staff, let them show you their favourite products and ways to use Cannabis, and before you know it, you’ll hopefully be finding the relief you’ve been seeking. No, Cannabis doesn’t work for everyone (in fact, I’ve tried it myself and am one of the people that it does nothing for!). Don’t get discouraged right away…try other forms such as the bath bomb if an edible didn’t work for you, or vice versa. 

Cannabis is NOT a miracle cure, but when it works, it can really bring relief to an overwhelmed body. I hope you find this to be true in your case. Remember…

There is always hope

Using CBD Oil In The Bath

Chronic Pain And How To Manage It (With Real Solutions)

Note: This post contains Affiliate Links which provides an income to me at no cost to you.

In 2016, an estimated 20.4% of U.S. adults had Chronic Pain and in Canada, the numbers say approximately 1 in every 4 people lives with Persistant Pain. Chronic/Persistant Pain is described as pain that extends beyond 3 months of the estimated recovery time of an injury.

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The author dealing with an Atypical Trigeminal Neuralgia flare up

Causes

Chronic Pain can be caused by the following:

  • Past injuries or surgeries
  • Back problems
  • Migraines and other headaches
  • Arthritis
  • Nerve damage
  • Infections
  • Fibromyalgia, a condition in which people feel muscle pain throughout their bodies
  • Other invisible illnesses such as Lupus, MS or Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome.

Symptoms

Chronic pain can range from mild to severe. It can continue day after day or come and go. The pain can feel like:

  • A dull ache
  • Throbbing
  • Burning
  • Shooting
  • Squeezing
  • Stinging
  • Soreness
  • Stiffness

Sometimes pain is just one of many symptoms, which can also include:

  • Feeling exhausted despite rest
  • Loss of appetite
  • Sleep disturbances (I’m writing this at 2:30am)
  • Mood changes
  • Physical Weakness
  • Depletion of energy

Chronic Pain and Your Mental Health

Chronic pain can interfere with your daily life, keeping you from doing things you want and need to do. It can wear on your self-esteem and make you feel angry, depressed, anxious, and frustrated. A persistant feeling of sadness may accompany Chronic Pain. Often, people with Chronic Pain have to give up work, hobbies and activities they enjoy, which leads to further depression, etc.

Fighting Back

With such a high prevalence of Chronic Pain in North America, how does one fight back? How do you manage living with Chronic Pain and still maintain quality of life? There are a number of ways to manage, such as:

Pain Management Courses

These courses can be a combination of Cognitive Behaviour Theraphy, Meditation and Mindfulness, Injections to help with certain types of pain, and group talk where you have the support of others in a healthy moderated environment. There are also online pain management courses for those unable to get to programs in other locations. These include:

Pain Foundations BC

Online Therapy Pain Course

Pathway Through Pain

Mind Body Pain Clinics

On Amazon.com, you can also purchase the following – click each title to link directly to Amazon:

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Pain Management Tools

There are a number of tools available that may help you with your Chronic Pain, and are worth trying.

TENs Unit

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Mindfulness For Pain

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Mindfulness Solution

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Infrared Solutions

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Hypnotic Techniques for Pain Management

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Cognitive Behaviour Therapy Workbook

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It is my sincere hope that some of these suggestions may be just what you need to help you manage your Chronic Pain. Don’t forget to check for Pain Management Services at your local hospital as well. They often run classes of 4-8 weeks that can help you learn how to support yourself.

Medication And More

Medications play a huge role in managing your Chronic Pain. Opioids are in the news now as doctors across North America are being forced to scale back the number of prescriptions they write, but there is still a useful place for them and it’s worth discussing with your doctor to see if you can benefit.

Other medications that help include drugs like Cymbalta, Lyrica and Savella for Fibromyalgia pain, Gabapentin for nerve pain, Amitriptyline for anxiety and pain, and supplements like B12, Glucosimine, Magnesium, SAMe and Vitamin D

This article from Medical News today lists a number of essential oils that can help with pain, and discusses other complementary tools such as acupuncture and yoga.

Yoga For Pain Relief

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Yoga Essentials

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Essential Oils

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I hope that some of these suggestions will help you manage your Chronic Pain and give you some relief. If you have any suggestions for products that work well for you that I should consider in a future post, please feel free to leave a comment using this form

Remember…

There Is Always Hope

 

 

The Creative Side Of Chronic Pain

Some of the most creative people in the world live with Chronic Pain or some type of health challenge. I know, because I’ve gathered a bunch of them together to showcase their talents, right here. Read on!

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Meet Julianne Ryan

Julianne is currently working as an art mentor for an artist with disabilities whilst volunteering her time to Mixed Palette Inc. an inclusive art group in Rockingham.

Julianne uses natural substrates, wood panels and recycled papers and works mostly with watercolour, ink and pencil to create depictions of feelings and experiences. Her latest works are multilayered with overlapping images that explore her experiences of chronic illness while correspondingly relating to her connection with nature. She also produces digital drawings, illustrations of birds and poetry that link to her memories, experiences and to current wellness practices.

She is currently working towards her first solo exhibition to be held at Forest Heritage Centre Gallery, Dwellingup in July/August.

Here are four samples of her amazing art:

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Art created with Inktense pencil, ink and watercolour on wood panel

Undergrowth series: Inktense pencil, ink and watercolour on wood panel

Julianne can be contacted via Instagram and through the website at Living With Functional Neurological Disorder . She is a proud supporter of this particular charity.

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Meet Christalle Bodiford

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Christalle Bodiford is an artist, advocate, writer, and adventure seeker. As an entrepreneur diagnosed with epilepsy, Christalle brings a unique perspective of empowerment that inspires others to embrace a positive mindset and live with purpose. When she’s not writing or advocating, Christalle enjoys puppy snuggles with her scruffy terrier and outdoor adventures with her husband.

Christalle was recently featured on this blog as one of my Interviewees for Interview April. Read more about her here.

Here are some examples of the work she’s done on her incredible book:

Woosah Warrior Mockup

Christalle has provided this next page as one you can print out and colour:

Woosah Warrior Cover Coloring Page-01

For more information, please visit Christalle at her website. She supports the Epilepsy Foundation which can be reached here.

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Meet deni

deni weber is a 67-year-old psychologist turned artist after major traumatic life events triggered multiple chronic illnesses.  A Christ-follower, she uses her God-given gifts of creativity to help and encourage others as well as provide healing for herself, while recovering from limbic system traumas. Formerly bed-ridden for years, she is now finding healing using neuroplasticity techniques – creativity being a major healing component.  She is an artist, singer-songwriter, and writer having several unpublished novels and screenplays hiding in a drawer. Giving credit to God, she declares her works are, “by His grace, and for His glory.”

Here are some examples of deni’s work:

“Welcome to My Garden Series – Purple Butterflies” Acrylics on Linen Canvas – 2.5” x 3.5”

 

“Forgiven” Graphite on 140# Cold Press, 12” x 12”

 

“Hidden in the Woods” PanPastel on Colourfix Board 2.5” x 3.5”

 

Please visit deni on her website to view more of her work. She’s also a huge supporter of The Flute Maker Ministries.

 

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Meet Alisha

Alisha Nurse is a trained broadcast journalist, and enjoys sharing stories. She lives with various chronic health problems including fibromyalgia, depression, anxiety, complex post traumatic stress disorder and borderline personality disorder. These often challenge her creativity but they’ve also been her greatest inspiration to tell stories that make a difference.

She is interested in stories that change the narrative about ethnic minorities, chronically unwell people and those often cast on the sidelines.

Her favourite things include cheese, curries, and interacting with the world around her.

She has graciously allowed me to share one of her poems here:

~~~~~~

I do not recognise myself standing in the many shadows of you.
You, towering, all-consuming, ever present but hidden away,
in plain sight.
Yet I feel you in every part of me. Trying to become me.

Not all monsters lurk like you.
Once awakened, you thrive, clamour, steal, reverberate …through the length and breath of my mortal body,
Silently leaving deadly, indelible traces of your mark, like on a cracked egg, ready to fall apart,
any, anytime now, but still holding itself together as the lines spread and spread,
Until I am finally broken.

Your crack lines emerge in places impossible.
From earthen shell to the soul and heartland of me.
Breaking, smashing, pillaging anything and everything, until I am nothing of my former self; nothing of possible Me(s).

But even broken things can be beautiful.
With floods of tears and streams of blood I shall, I shall put me back together again.
I emerge not the ‘Me’ that once was, was to be or had been imagined with dreams for the future.

I rise as someone, something else entirely–Pained but persevering. Flawed but fluid. Broken but beautiful and believing that I shall conquer.
I am and will be the ‘Me’ that never was imagined.
I am the ‘Me’ that’s emerged from the ashes of pain.
I will not fit your cardboard cutouts or your nicely stencilled stereotypes.

And I am not sorry.

To survive, I change. Constantly.
As the monster morphs so will I – imperfect still, but ready to give bloody hell in all battles to come.

~~~~~

Wow! That’s powerful. To find out more about Alisha, visit her website. She blogs about overcoming chronic illness on www.theinvisiblef.com and shares other fictional works on www.alishanurse.com

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Meet Chrissy Joy Bell

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Meet Chrissy Joy Bell. She lives in Columbus, Oh, USA. and says “I’m married to an awesome guy named Ryan. I received a fibromyalgia diagnosis in 2008 after a serious illness, and I live with chronic migraine. I own a hand made business where I create all sorts of fun and snuggly things out of yarn. I originally used creativity to handle the changes that were happening in my life. Now it gives me a serious sense of fulfillment to know “Hey, I made that!””

Most recently Chrissy self published a coloring book of hand drawn mandalas, a project she began for her own enjoyment that others are now also sharing with her. My hopes for the future are to continue making, and to help others understand their journey in life and with chronic illness.

Here are some examples of the different work that Chrissy has done: 

Can with crocheted

Can Cozy

Crocheted animal

A Favourite Friend

Black & White Mandala

Mandala designed by Chrissy

See more of Chrissy’s work at The Pink Woobie or learn more about her at Find Joy Be Well

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Meet Sergio Garcia

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Description: Sergio Garcia is a Writer at Travelevil.com , he is a music, travel and writing lover, can’t stop thinking about the new article to publish. Sergio believes that travel can heal both soul and body, this is why he joined Travelevil community where both writers and readers share their stories and exchange knowledge about the various travel experience they had in the past.
Beside Blogging and Marketing, Sergio is a certified scuba diver, another world that a lot of people need to discover and enjoy.

Here are some of his favourite photos to share:

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You can reach Sergio via email at travelevil.com@gmail.com 

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I am in serious awe of these talented people! I hope you are too! Please feel free to leave your comments about their work as each of them will be happy to answer questions as well. 

And what about you? How do you show your creativity, whether you live with Chronic Illness or not?  Share in the comments and tell us what you like to do. 

If you’d like to be considered for a future post showcasing even more talent, please fill out the contact form found here and let me know. I’ll be in touch to discuss a second post for later in the year. 

Thank you for joining me. Remember…

There is always hope

Invisible Illness – But You Look Fine!

One of the hardest parts of living with an Invisible Illness such as Fibromyalgia, MS, Ehlers Danlos, etc. is that you quite often look just fine on the outside, while your insides are screaming in pain. This leads many people to wonder if you truly are ill, or how serious your illness actually is. How do you handle this, as a Person with Chronic Pain (PwCP)?Screen Shot 2018-12-10 at 10.56.48 AM

For one thing, you should never have to make excuses for your pain to anyone. What you feel is what you feel, and there is never a reason to justify it or prove it, not even to your doctors. For years, people with Fibromyalgia went undiagnosed or misdiagnosed because Pain was often the only symptom a patient could describe. There are no other outward symptoms and nothing comes back in the blood tests or x-rays that a doctor might order. It’s only through using the 18 Tender Points and determining how many of them you have that a definitive diagnosis can be made for Fibro.

Other diseases often come with outward symptoms – the “butterfly rash” of lupus, the enlarged joints of Rheumatoid Arthritis, the dislocating joints of Ehler Danlos, the varying symptoms of MS – all of them a visual reminder that there is something wrong with a person. Fibro doesn’t present itself that way, and so a person can often look “normal” like everyone else, yet be in a flare up.

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So how do you handle it when the people who are closest to you don’t believe you are ill or doubt the severity of your illness. The first step is to educate them on what Fibromyalgia is: a disorder characterized by widespread pain, which causes many symptoms like extreme fatigue, sleep issues, memory loss and mood issues. It is essentially a very painful, exhausting disease, for which there is no cure and few treatments.” It is becoming much more recognized in the Medical field, unlike in the past, and is well accepted as a legitimate condition, just like arthritis, Lupus, MS, etc.

Basically, your brain miscommunicates with the nerves in the spinal cord and sends out the wrong messages to your body, resulting in an overload of symptoms. This graphic may be helpful in showing you just some of what you can experience:

FibroSymptoms2

And this is the reason it’s such a hard disease to diagnose because these symptoms are often looked at just on their own, and not seen as part of the bigger picture. It’s no wonder people look at us and think we’re crazy. To have all these symptoms and yet still look perfectly normal on the outside…well, I’d wonder too perhaps. That’s where the education comes in. The more we teach people about Fibromyalgia and how it mimics so many other diseases, the more people will realize just how huge a burden we are carrying every day.

Nobody wants to be told they look awful though, so how do you break this Catch-22? You want people to see you as you really are, but you don’t necessarily want to look ill at the same time. Are you obligated to dress up and put on makeup everytime you go out, just to look “good” for strangers? Of course not, but I am advocating that you do it for yourself if you’re able. Run a brush through your hair, throw some lipstick on, go for a trendier haircut or a manicure. Never do it for someone else though and never let a stranger’s comments get to you. Only you know how you’re feeling at any point and sometimes it’s just not possible to do these sorts of things. Pain may get in the way, or finances or depression…in these times, just do the best you can with what you have in the way of energy and time and desire.

Remember…you are perfect just the way you are…everything else you do is a bonus.

Education of others is key, and I truly believe that the more we can share about Fibromyalgia and other Invisible Illnesses with them, the more they will understand what we are going through, and the more compassionate they will become. Perhaps then they will stop commenting on how “fine” we look, and will start seeing us in a true light. Maybe they will see our struggles, our problems, our symptoms and what we have to go through on a daily basis just to survive and finally understand how difficult our lives truly are. Then and only then will come the appreciation and admiration we’ve been waiting for.

There is always hope.

 

Fibromyalgia – In Tune With Our Bodies

I’ve been thinking lately of how lucky I am that despite the fact I live with Chronic Pain, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Fibromyalgia and Invisible Illnesses, I’m actually quite healthy. I know that sounds like an oxymoron, but I rarely come down with colds, I can’t remember the last time I had a flu or stomach bug or even when I could say I was “sick”. I try to remember to get a flu shot each year because I’m Diabetic, but it didn’t happen last year and so far this year, I haven’t made it to a clinic either. It’s also in my best interest to get one, because since having surgery for severe Gastric Reflux Disease in 2004, I am unable to physically vomit – if I get sick where vomiting becomes an issue, I have to go to the hospital and have a nasal gastric tube placed to remove my stomach contents. Not fun!!

As the old saying goes, aging ain’t for sissies! When you live with Fibromyalgia, you live with all sorts of “side effects”. This diagram displays some of the many “extras” a Fibromite can expect to experience:

FibroSymptomsDiagram

These are all common symptoms and it can be difficult to tell them apart from other illnesses, which makes it extremely important to be aware of your body and to note when something feels “off” or different than what is normal for you. We are generally quite in tune with our own bodies and are quickly able to determine when a new symptom appears that doesn’t fit in with our usual symptoms.

What happens though when you do experience something that you’re unsure of? Your first step should always be to see your Primary Health Care Provider anytime something comes up that is markedly different than your normal. It could be one of Fibromyalgia’s many symptoms, but it’s always better to be safe. I remember one time many years back when I started having severe pain in the lower left quadrant. It happened when I was living in Calgary and I had just finished a volunteer shift at the Calgary Stampede grounds. I’d eaten a corn dog and a few minutes later, was suddenly hit with terrible pain in my lower left side. I could barely walk but managed to make it on to the C-Train (the Lite Rapid Transit) and then called my husband to pick me up at the station to take me to the hospital. It turned out that a cyst that I didn’t know I had on my ovary had burst. I was prepared to put it down to something Fibro related and the only reason I got the proper diagnosis is because the pain was so bad, I went to the ER.

It’s easy to be dismissive of everything we feel and call it Fibro related, so we have to be careful not to fall into this trap. How do you tell the difference between Fibro related pain and something new or different for you? Here is a checklist to use:

  • Familiar or not – have you felt this same symptom before, or does this feel like something “new” to you?
  • Does it last longer than usual? This could potentially be a new situation that needs attention
  • It it more intense than usual? This could be the sign of a new problem
  • Is it in a new part of your body? This is more likely the sign of something new
  • Did it start suddenly or gradually? Gradual pain is more likely to be Fibro related.
  • Does something just feel “off” to you? Trust your instincts!

It’s recommended that everyone go for an annual checkup, but it’s especially important that you and your doctor stay in touch with how you are doing, outside of your Fibromyalgia. Don’t forget about the rest of your health.

Speaking of health, I want to share this new Health Alphabet. It may be helpful in future medical discussions, especially if aging is becoming a concern for you:

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Okay, a little humour never hurts, but when it comes to Fibromyalgia and changing symptoms, you do need to be careful not to overlook something that could have the potential to be serious. Always trust your instincts about how you’re feeling and see your doctor if something just doesn’t seem right. It’s better to be safe than sorry.

There is always hope

Refresher Course

I thought I’d start out the year with a refresher course on the conditions I live with and how blogging has had such an impact in my life. Because of my blogging, I have had chances to be interviewed in a Canadian National newspaper, on two different podcasts, and several different articles online. The various conditions I write about are because of the fact I live with them and am personally acquainted with them. So, without further ado, here we go:

  • Chronic Pain
  • Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
  • Fibromyalgia / Myofascial Pain
  • Osteoarthritis (in all my major joints)
  • Forestier’s Disease (aka D.I.S.H.)
  • Type 2 Diabetes (on insulin)
  • Trigeminal Neuralgia
  • Bipolar Disorder
  • Gastroparesis
  • Internal Adhesions/Scar Tissue/Chronic Pelvic Pain
  • Hypothyroidism

So I’ve talked about my Chronic Pain from Fibromyalgia and Osteoarthritis, and when I say I have arthritis in all my major joints, I’m serious. I have it in my shoulders, elbows, wrists and fingers, my cervical, thoracic and lumbar spine, left hip (right hip has been replaced), knees, ankles and toes. Some areas like my left hip and right knee are quite serious and will need replacing, but the rest I’ll have to live with.

Meanwhile, my thoracic spine has a different type of bone condition called Forestier’s Disease or D.I.S.H., which stands for Diffuse (Widespread) Idiopathic (Of Unknown Cause) Skeletal (Referring to the Skeleton) Hyperostosis (Excessive Growth of Bone). It forms in the shape of a bone spur, but instead of a normal spur that could be removed, it looks more like melted candle wax on the spine, so nothing can be done about it.

Diffuse-idiopathic-skeletal-hyperostosis-DISH-of-the-spine-grave-290-male-50-60-yrs

I also have regular bone spurs on my right hand – I had one removed from inside my pointer finger as it grew through a tendon, and there is a second one on the outside of my middle finger growing through the knuckle. Both have been very painful and interfere(d) with typing and writing.

My Type 2 Diabetes has been with me for 8 years now and is mostly under control. I go for regular blood tests every 3 months, to get my A1C numbers that show my average blood sugar levels for the previous 3 months. Generally speaking, I average around 6.9 to 7.2 which is slightly higher than the 5.9 – 6.2 my doctor would like, but I do my best. I use long acting insulin at night, 14 units which does a good job at helping to keep things under control. I’m trying to eat better, but I’m a sucker for sweets and it’s hard to be disciplined.

My Trigeminal Neuralgia is something I’ve talked about before so you can read the article about it here.  The same goes for my Bipolar Disorder.

So, what else is on that list. Ah yes, the ever lovely Gastroparesis

what-is-gastroparesis

Now, the way they determine if you have this or not is through something called a motility test. In my case, they wanted me off ALL of my meds first to make sure they weren’t contributing to the problem, so for 2 days prior to my test I had to quit my medications cold turkey. That included my meds for Fibromyalgia, my anti-psychotics AND my opioid narcotic for pain. Do you have any idea what going through withdrawal is like? It was horrendous. I had the shakes, the runs, I couldn’t eat or sleep, and for those 2 days, I alternated between thinking I was dying and wanting to die to having to feel better in order to die.

On the day of the test, I went to the hospital to where the Nuclear testing is done. I knew that I was going to be eating an egg sandwich with a radioactive tracer in it and that tracer would be monitored through a series of special x-rays, but I explained to the nurse that everything I ate was immediately running right through me like water. She was so sweet…she “reserved” me a private bathroom, brought me my sandwich and told me to eat as much as I could while I sat there. Talk about embarrassing!!! It’s embarrassing writing about it!!! But, I managed just over 3/4’s of it, which she said was enough. She brought me into the x-ray room where there was a gurney to lay on, and then gave me a warm blanket.

The first pictures were taken every 2 minutes, so I just sat. Then they took them every 5 minutes apart, then 10 minutes apart, then 15, then 30 and finally 2 pictures 1 hour apart each. In between, I slept on the gurney, and my nurse brought me as many warm blankets as I wanted. She also brought me a cold wet face cloth for my forehead. When it was all over, I gave her a big hug and thanked her for being so kind. Then I took my medications asap!!!!

The tests showed that I have a moderate degree of low motility so my food sits in my stomach for a long period of time before moving on to the intestines. This explains why I always look bloated and pregnant. There are medications that can be taken, but I’ve asked my doctor if we can just hold off and wait on that for now. This is more of an inconvenience than anything right now, and I just don’t want any more drugs in my system than I absolutely need. If the problem becomes hugely bothersome, we’ll revisit it, but in the meantime, I’ll just try to watch what I eat, drink more water and try to exercise a bit more.

The Internal Pelvic pain is because I have had a number of pelvic surgeries over the years, so there is a lot of internal scar tissue left over that has attached itself to things like my bladder and bowel, etc. There are occasions when I move a certain way, and those adhesions stretch very painfully – it feels like velcro being ripped apart except it’s my body doing the ripping. It takes my breath away sometimes, it’s so painful, but it only lasts for a minute or two, then it’s gone.

Which leads to Hypothyroidism. For a long time, I assumed that Chronic Fatigue Syndrome was the only reason for my constant exhaustion, as my Thyroid numbers always came back normal on blood tests done every three months. One day though, my thyroid went rogue and those numbers were crazy. I had been especially tired…like dragging my ass tired, needed toothpicks to keep my eyes open tired

DraggingMyButt

Oohhh, that is NOT a good look on me!!! My doctor put me on meds and I could feel a difference in a very short period of time. On my next 3 month course of blood work, everything was back to normal, so now I take Synthroid on a daily basis for the rest of my life, to ensure I have a properly working system. So glad that was an easy fix!!

So there you have it. It’s a tough road to walk, I have to be honest. I live with pain 24/7 and have for almost 30 years now. Suffice it to say that you have to be mighty strong to live like this, to get through the day-to-day of actually living in pain. I know some people who just couldn’t. They tried so, so hard, but in the end, their pain was too much for them, and they took their own lives.

I’m a huge advocate for assisted suicide for people who live with severe, intractable pain. We take better care of our pets when they are hurting than we do our humans, and I think that is just plain wrong. I believe every human has the right to choose to die with dignity and I’m glad our Government has come on board with this. I know it’s not perfect, but at least things have started and that’s the main thing.

One thing having all these conditions HAS done though is that it’s given me a platform to blog about them and to discuss them as a Patient Partner in my volunteer work. I live in Langford, BC Canada and I belong to an organization called Patient Voices Network. They help take the voice of the patient and partner us with Heath Care Organizations who need Patient Advocates for the work that they are doing. I’ve been involved in committee work, focus groups, conferences, quality assurance forums, seminars and more because of PVN. The educational experience I’ve received is on par to anything I attended in my working life and in fact, when I attend anything in their offices in Vancouver now, it’s like being greeted by family – I know everyone and they all know me, I’ve been there so often for meetings.

I currently sit on 4 different committees: I am a member of the PVN Oversight & Advisory Committee, I currently sit on the Clinical Resource Committee for the BC Emergency Physicians Network , and I accepted a role with the Laboratory Quality Council Committee. We are responsible for all Labs on Vancouver Island as well as all Medical Blood Collection Stations.

Most recently, I took on a new role as committee member on the Measurement System for Physician Quality Improvement- Surgical Group. I am surrounded by top surgeons in Cardiac Care, Orthopedics and Neurology, plus high-ranking members from the Ministry of Health, the BC Patient Safety & Quality Council and other Health Organizations – and then there’s me. The lone patient voice to represent the masses. It’s a huge responsibility and one I take very seriously. I’ve already spoken out to let them know that while they see quality one way, I as a patient see it differently, and I expect my voice to be heard. It was empowering to have them tell me that I am the whole reason the others are there, because it’s all about the patient in the end.

So all this adds up to some pretty amazing experiences for me because of the pretty extraordinary pain that I live with on a daily basis. I have been truly blessed in my life, and I’m fortunate to be able to share it with you, my Dear Readers. Thank you for taking this journey with me. I hope to bring you more articles this year about Chronic Pain, Chronic Fatigue, Fibromyalgia and other Invisible Illnesses. And remember…

There is always hope

Chronic Pain & Post Holiday Blues

blog-holiday-blues

Do you find yourself feeling more pain after the holidays are over? More physical pain seems natural because of all the running around that we do with Christmas and New Years and the extra work that happens to make the holidays special. What about the post holiday blues? Do you find yourself feeling more mental pain when the holidays are over? More depression, or more Seasonal Sadness? How do you manage that and where is it coming from?

Some of it comes from the Holidays themselves. Often, we project what we want them to look like instead of accepting the reality of what they actually are for us. We want the perfect family around the perfect tree with perfect presents and everyone getting along in perfect harmony. What happens instead is the stress of buying, decorating, cooking and cleaning all while appeasing children, spouse and family members who may or may not be speaking to each other on the big day. No wonder you’re left with a huge let down after the New Year rolls in.

Financial stress plays a huge role as well, once those credit card bills start showing up in January. Even if you swore you wouldn’t have a credit card Christmas or Hanukkah, chances are you’re still looking at some expenses that you weren’t expecting, and now you need to do some budget adjusting. That’s enough to make anyone feel blue. And if you’re one of the many people who put your entire holiday shopping on your credit card, you’ll be feeling the hit even harder.

The weather also plays a huge part in how we feel in the New Year. Depending on where you live, you could be seeing sunshine and cold temperatures, mild temperatures and rain, or bitterly cold and snow, or any combination in between. The days are short and darkness prevails. Seasonal Affectiveness Disorder is a real condition that deeply alters the lives of more people than we realize. Getting out into the natural sunlight is the best remedy, but the alternate is to use a special lamp to get the light you need to function properly during the winter months.

How else can you combat these Post Holiday Blues? Here is a list of suggestions that might help:

Limit alcohol – Now that the holidays are over, start to limit your alcohol intake, and try not to keep it readily available around your house. Drink lots of water to flush your system and get back to good nutrition.

Get plenty of sleep – Try to go to bed at a specific time each night. Being well-rested can improve your mood and help you feel ready to take on the day.

Exercise regularly – Plug in your headphones and pop out for a walk around the block a couple of times a day. A quick 10-minute walk will get your heart rate up and release mood-boosting endorphins.

Learn to say “no” – Overscheduling and not making time for yourself can lead to emotional breakdowns. Learn how to say “no,” and stay firm on your decision.

Reflect on the Special Moments – 

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Grab a hot tea or hot chocolate, sit by the fireplace, and reflect on what you loved about this holiday season.

  • What was the best conversation you had?
  • What was the most thoughtful gift you received?
  • What was the funniest thing that happened?
  • What was one disaster that turned into a blessing or a great memory?

Try Something New – New Year, new hobbies! Make up your mind to try something new this year. Take a class, return to an old hobby, or pick up a new one.

Make a Budget – No one likes to dwell on financial stuff, but vow to make a budget this year and then stick to it. You’ll be amazed at how much stress relief this can offer you when you see exactly where you money is going and how much you can actually save every single month. Buy software for your computer to help you, download an app or get a book to make it easier.

Volunteer –  If you can spare a bit of time each week or each month, consider doing some volunteer work in an area that interests you the most. From working with kids, seniors, or animals to helping with community arts and theatre, health organizations or your local Downtown Business Association, there are so many places that can use your help. Even just a couple of hours a month makes a difference when we all pitch in together.

Give Blood – Another way to help others, if you are physically able to donate blood, please consider giving. There’s nothing like being a Lifesaver to make you feel good!

Keep a Gratitude Journal – Each day, write down three things you are grateful for.

Can you come up with your own suggestions for this list to make it your own? If and when you do, share your ideas with your friends and in the comment section below. One thing I do want to remind you of is that if the Post Holiday Blues tend to linger on for longer than a month, you may want to speak to your doctor. You could be experiencing something more than just “Post Holiday Blues” and require proper medical care. Don’t ever be afraid to ask for help if you feel dark thoughts or deep depression. There is help available and absolutely NO shame in asking for it. I live with Bipolar Disorder and have to be very careful during and after the holidays that my mania isn’t triggered because I would go on shopping binges.

Remember…

There is always hope

 

Ending The Year

It’s December 29th and the year is drawing to a close. I want to take this time to simply recap the year and say thank you to my Dear Readers for spending your time with me in 2018.

From the beginning of the year, when I really got started blogging, I started out by writing Happy New Year .  My main theme at that time was to talk about my hip replacement surgery which was the real reason this blog came into existance. I had been searching for personal stories of “younger” women who had undergone hip replacements but hadn’t found much, so I thought I’d share my story for others who might find it helpful for themselves. One thing led to another and before I knew it, I was writing about my other health issues, including Fibromyalgia, Chronic Pain, Chronic Fatigue and Invisible Illnesses.

I’ve had the opportunity to share my thoughts about body image, intimacy when you live with Chronic Pain, the sleeplessness that comes with Fibromyalgia and Invisible Illnesss, and how the simple loss of bathing can mean so much heartache. On the other hand, I’ve been able to share about gratitude and finding joy on more than one occasion, so I’ve tried to focus on the positives as much as possible, whenever possible.

I couldn’t do this without you. Without my Dear Readers, there wouldn’t be much sense in putting this out there, so I appreciate each and every one of you who comes to my blog and reads what I have to say. You may not comment on every post, heck…you may never comment on a post I write, but the numbers don’t lie. My stats show that you are there and that you keep coming back. In fact, when I took a week off and didn’t do a thing to market the blog…no Pinterest, no Twitter, no Social Media at all, the numbers dropped, but a bunch of you still came by to see if there was anything new.

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You can see where I was away for the week. On Nov. 15th and 16th, I was in Vancouver for a volunteer meeting, and away from my computer the whole time. When I put the effort in, you do the same and come back to see what’s new…the numbers don’t lie, and I am forever grateful.

So, to wrap up 2018, I want to say thank you. You’ve helped me reach a far greater level of success than I ever thought I’d make, simply because you like to read my thoughts. That’s pretty amazing to me. I just want to provide as much information as I can to anyone who is living with Fibromyalgia, Chronic Pain, Chronic Fatigue or Invisible Illness. I want you to know you’re not alone. I’m right there with you and for as long as I’m able, I will continue to write and bring you articles and information to help you thrive.

I wish each and every one of you a very Happy New Year. May you be blessed in 2019 with the very best the year can offer. Remember…

There is always hope