It’s Time To Talk About Spiritual Beliefs

Person standing with open arms to amazing sunrise

If you live with Chronic Pain or an Invisible Illness, has someone ever said to you “I’ll pray for you” or “You’re in my prayers”?  What does that mean to you? Do you have Spiritual Beliefs that make those prayers easy to accept? Do you believe in a Higher Power? In God? Or do you believe that when we die, that’s it…there is nothing afterwards. No afterlife, no Heaven or Hell, no God of any type?

I am a Christ Follower. I call myself that because too many things have been done by “Christians” in the name of Christ that taint the Holy name, and I refuse to be associated with them. I’d rather try to live my life the way Christ modelled it, and so being a Christ Follower is a much better way of describing my religious leanings. I believe that He is the only way to Eternal Life and I believe in Heaven and Hell. I don’t talk about this often and almost never in public, but when I say I’ll be praying for you, trust me…I WILL be praying for you.

I also believe that everyone has a right to their own beliefs, and I will never push my beliefs on anyone else. If you want to talk about God with me, I’m happy to do so, but I won’t raise the subject first. It’s not that I’m shy or embarrassed about God, but more that I’m respectful of others, and I prefer to wait to discuss religion until the subject is brought up by others first. I am definitely NOT an Evangelist.

So, why am I talking about it now? Well, the reason is that the question came up in a Chronic Pain forum I belong to when someone asked the forum members “do you have Spiritual beliefs that help you cope?”.

I haven’t seen anyone else answer yet, but I wanted to share my response. Yes, I have a God who loves me dearly and who has a plan for my life. Right now, that plan includes me living with Chronic Pain and Chronic Fatigue from the many conditions I deal with. I think the plan includes these illnesses because He’s using me to help others, through my blog and my volunteer and advocacy work. What type of volunteer and advocacy work do I do?

I work as a Patient Advocate for a group in BC, Canada where I live called the Patient Voices Network.

Patient Partner Logo, Patient Voices Network

Anyone in the Province can join, and it’s designed for ordinary people to have a say in how Health Care is delivered in the Province. Through my involvement, I am currently sitting on 4 committees, plus assisting on a project involving virtual reality and connecting with your doctor, and helping one Provincial Working Group where we are designing a survey to measure Patient satisfaction with their experiences in the Emergency Department and subsequent transfer to an Acute Ward before going home.

The committees I sit on do such work as:

  • Laboratory Quality Control
  • Updating Patient Information Sheets for discharge from Emergency Rooms
  • Quality Improvement Measures for Surgeons
  • The Oversight & Advisory Committee for the Patient Voices Network

I also had the honour of being part of The 2017 Canadian Guideline for Opioids for Chronic Non-Cancer Pain. I recently took part in a “Research for Canadian Anesthesiology” conference and I’m hoping to soon be a Facilitator of a Pain Management Support group. 

So as you can see, my work is wide and varied and brings me together with many different people on a regular basis. I’m often asked “why” do I do what I do. Why do I volunteer my time to all these causes when my own health is so compromised and the truth is, it’s complicated.

I get a lot out of volunteering and blogging. It helps me stay relevant in the world around me. I get to utilize the skills I had while I was still able to work. I like to help people, and I genuinely care about others, especially those who are experiencing the same types of health conditions that I have. And yes, there is a spiritual component to it for me as well. It feels good for me to give back, to help my neighbour, just as Jesus commands me to do in the Bible. To love one another. This is how I show my love. I don’t see it as a duty at all, it just happens to be something I’m passionate about (another blessing from God) and something that’s easy for me to follow.

It’s also these Spiritual beliefs that help me deal with my own Chronic Pain on a day to day basis. I couldn’t do this alone, there’s no way I could live my life every day without God’s help. I put my trust in the Lord to get me through every day…and this is the part that confuses people or scares them off or makes them suspicious. How do you “put your trust in Jesus”?  How does the Lord make things better?

Well, I’d be lying if I said I had the answer to that. All I know is that when I gave my life to Christ in 2001, I made a decision to trust Him, that He would always be there for me, and I’ve never once regretted it. When my pain is that the worst, I know that He suffered more and that He understands. He is with me in my agony and will never leave me. It helps to know that and makes dealing with it easier. I know that He weeps for me. So why doesn’t He heal me?? Because He has a bigger plan for me and I GET THAT. I know I can’t see His plan, but I TRUST HIM. And while I wait, I make the most of my time here instead of wallowing and crying and whimpering about. He gives me the strength to do that and I do my best not to let Him down.

It’s all about Faith my friends. You either have it or you don’t. No one can force you to have faith; it comes from the heart and it’s between you and Him. I believe that God is taking care of me, that His plan is the best plan and that one day, either here on Earth or in Heaven, I’ll find out exactly what that plan is. I’m content to wait until it’s revealed to me. And in the meantime, I’ll keep doing what I’m doing, helping others as best I can, following His guidance. I covet the prayers of others, and if you ask me to pray for you, I will. Heck, I’ll pray for you even if you don’t ask. And if you ask me to take my religion somewhere where the sun don’t shine, I’ll respect your request.

Spiritual beliefs are tricky but they don’t have to be. It’s all about respect for each other, keeping an open mind, and loving your neighbour. Remember…

There is always hope

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the first post…

Well, here it is. The first post on my new blog “there is always hope”. I’ve decided to start a blog to share my experiences with having an invisible illness (or in my case, illnesses), as well as to document my journey through having a Total Hip Replacement. Thanks for joining me!

My name is Pamela. I’m 54 years old, living in Victoria, BC (Canada) and married to the most amazing hubby a gal could ask for. Ray has been by my side since we first connected in 1994, through a telephone dating service, back before the internet was even a thing. We hit it off immediately and after chatting for 6 weeks, finally arranged to meet in person. He cooked an amazing dinner, I made a fabulous dessert, that first date lasted for 3 days and the rest, as they say, is history.  😉

Cruise002
I have 2 children from a previous relationship. They are now adults – Troy is 34 and lives in Calgary and Ashley is 33 and lives in Vancouver. Ray and I are also grandparents to three cool boys – Eric (17), Jeddy (15) and Calen (11).

For as long as I can remember, I have always had some type of pain in my life, generally in my hips. Even back in my elementary school days, taking part in Phys Ed was tough – a lot of the stuff we did left me hurting so bad for days afterward, I just knew it wasn’t “normal”. I saw doctors, who basically said it was growing pains, but when you top out at 5’2″ as an adult, I tend to think that might not be the right answer.

Something else we checked into related to a condition I was born with, called Brachydactyly. I have bone missing in my ring fingers and corresponding toes, which makes them much shorter than they should be, and there’s improper knuckle formation as well. But, no…that didn’t seem to add up either, so basically, doctors had no answers and I was left to deal with it.

I learned to cope with it – it wasn’t agonizing or ruining my life, it was just different than what everyone else seemed to experience. Now of course, when I look back on it, I can see that I likely had Fibromyalgia as a pre-teen/teenager and may have been developing osteoarthritis at an early age as well.

Fast forward to adulthood though and the health issues are a lot more complex than “growing pains”. The list is long, but it’s all a part of who I am:

  • Fibromyalgia
  • Osteoarthritis in most of my major joints
  • Myofascial Pain
  • Trigeminal Neuralgia
  • Diffuse Idiopathic Skeletal Hyperostosis
  • Chronic Pain
  • Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
  • Raynaud’s Disease
  • Internal Adhesions/Scar Tissue/Chronic Pelvic Pain

  • Diabetes Type 2 (on insulin)
  • Bipolar Disorder

I haven’t had a pain free day in so many years, I don’t think I can even remember back that far. In 2004, I had surgery for severe Gastric Reflux disease, which led to some nerve damage around the sternum area. Over the following few years, I have several other surgeries and hospitalizations, including having my left ovary removed after a cyst burst (2006). Then my gallbladder had to be removed in an emergency surgery (2007) and 2 months after that, my right ovary was removed, again in emergency surgery (2007).

Those last three surgeries all happened within 6 months….my body was completely overwhelmed and I went into a major Fibromyalgia flare up that I don’t think has ever completely gone away. My daily pain is generally a 4-5 on the pain scale – and that’s with me taking various pain medications and other drugs, and using pain management techniques.

I don’t know if you’ve seen the various pain scales out there that doctors use to judge the level of pain you’re experiencing, but let me introduce you. This is the standard doctor’s chart:
Standard-Pain-Scale
This is the chart that people who suffer from chronic pain prefer to use:
ABetterPainChart
Thanks to Allie Brosh from Hyperbole and a Half for this – here’s the link to the post it originated from: Pain Scale

So, this is the first post of what I hope will be many, to share my journey of living with Chronic Pain and Chronic Fatigue. It’s about living with Invisible Illness and often having to prove that yes, there’s a reason you use a handicap parking pass. And it will become a journey of having a Total Hip Replacement at a relatively young age (haha!), because I couldn’t find a whole lot of personal experiences when I searched Google. I’m the curious sort – I like to know how other people’s experiences have been. I know the clinical stuff…what I want to know is the real-life stuff that patients experience. I’m passionate about that, and I’ll tell you more about that and why in another post. Until then…thanks for reading, and remember…

there is always hope